The Silliest Little Short Ever II
by nat-chan
Summary: It's the hottest day of the summer.....and Darien has lost his mind?


The Silliest Little Short Ever II  
  
Author: nat-chan  
E-mail: natia_99@yahoo.com   
Rated: G.....???? bwahahahahahaha  
Disclaimer: We've been through this before......I am Naoko, all  
bow before me. Sigh. What is the problem? What? Why are you all  
staring at me like that? WAAAAAAAAHHH!  
  
Author's Notes: Ha ha, I'm back again, stuck in a miserable  
Toronto heat wave which inspired me to write another silly short.  
Wait, did I just use the word inspired in the same sentence as  
heat wave? *faint*  
  
p.s. I HATE HUMIDITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
p.p.s. Not to seem ungrateful I will now thank God for the   
following indispensable items:  
  
cough cough....  
  
1. watermelon. Thank you GOD for watermelon, without which my   
tongue would have evaporated.  
  
2. Shade. Without shade from trees (my new best friends) I would  
have melted on the walk home from the subway some time back.  
  
3. water. Yes, it's polluted and nasty up here, but without it  
I could not survive.  
  
4. people who leave their sprinklers on and unattended....bwahahaha  
Bless you foolish people. heh heh heh  
  
Annnnnnyways.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
Serena Tsukino awoke in the hottest day of summer to the sound of  
her mother's over-cheery morning voice hollaring,  
  
"SWWEEEEEEEEETIE, don't waste your weekend in bed! It's going to be  
a hot day, go enjoy it!"  
  
Serena muttered something incoherant and inadvertantly swatted Luna off  
her bed and sent her flying to the floor--sadly Luna was so   
accustomed to this routine that she never even woke up.  
  
Serena herself was all set to drift back into dreamland when she realized  
something. Something altogether yucky. Sitting up confirmed it.  
  
Her pillow was stuck to the side of her face.   
  
"Ugh!" She greeted the day with, as she peeled the suddenly malicious  
cotton from her face. This woke up her completely--much to her dismay for  
the next thing she realized was--  
  
"It's HOT! It must be like a hundred and ten degrees!" (I'll guess   
farenheit--which incidentally I can't spell--since most of you are from the   
states, but if anyone knows celcius it'd be like 40 degrees!!!! A quick   
fact: The normalhuman body temperature in celcius is 37.5!!! WAAAAGGGGHHHHH!)  
  
She then proceeded to fly into the bathroom, have a cold shower and pin her   
insanely long hair into a bun--gasp--not meatballs! Afterall, it was too hot  
to have her hair down at all. Then she threw on shorts and a tank top and grabbed  
Luna.  
  
"C'mon Luna, there's only one thing to do on a day like this, and that's get  
ICE CREAM!!!!!"  
  
ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.  
  
In a trail of smoke--literally since the day was so hot--she was gone and out the   
door. Her mother simply sighed as she read the paper beside a fan.  
  
Luna meanwhile, had only time to gasp out in shock as she was rudely awakened and  
then pray for her life when she managed to realize that the reason her eye  
sight seemed blurry was because of the speed at which she was travelling.  
  
"SeREEEEEEENNNNNNNNAAAAAAAAA!!!" She wailed but her voice was lost in the wind.  
  
Suddenly Serena screeched to a halt about a block from the arcade.  
  
"Phew, it's way too hot to travel THAT fast eh Luna? Better slow down."  
  
She walked at an ALMOST civilized pace the rest of the way, the nearly-noonday heat  
bearing down on them unmercifally. Serena began to pant and become unpleasantly...  
...sweaty.  
  
"Ugh." She said, for the second time that day, "I'm SO HOT! What a TERRIBLE day!"  
She seemed ready to continue and break into her usual wail when something caught her  
eye. Something that could not possibly be real.  
  
Across the street. On someone's lawn. Standing complacently in their sprinkler, was  
Darien.  
  
"Couldn't be." Muttered Serena, rubbing her eyes, "Wow Luna, I think I'm starting  
to SEE things!"  
  
She rubbed her eyes and looked again. Black pants, green blazer.....tall, dark hair....  
  
"It must be a mirage--I really need that ice cream!" She said shaking her head and  
hurrying off to the arcade with Luna in tow.  
  
With the usual tinkle of doorbells she entered the arcade, eager for the blast of  
precious air conditioning that would be her salvation--but it never came.  
  
The temperature was EXACTLY the same.  
  
"What? Why isn't it cold in here? ANDREEEEEEEEEEWWWW!"  
  
A very over-heated looking Andrew appeared from behind the counter, panting and stained  
with gear grease.  
  
"What's going on Andrew?!" Exclaimed Serena with concern--and desperation.  
  
Andrew sighed, "All the cooling equipment broke down this morning! The air conditioner,  
the freezers, everything!"  
  
Serena halted dead in her tracks. Her eyes grew wild and then narrowed dangerously as  
an odd little tick started in the corner of the left one.  
  
"Y-you mean............there's no ice cream?" She finished in a whisper and Andrew   
took a step back.  
  
"Er..n-no Serena. It's all melted....."  
  
She grew pale and faint looking, "I'm too hot to even WAIL Luna!"  
  
Luna shook her head and thanked the almighty for small blessings.  
  
"Sorry Serena, you'll have to try the other ice cream parlour down the street."  
Andrew said sadly and then returned to trying to fix the coolers. Clanking and mild  
cursing filled the silent, empty, sauna-like arcade.  
  
It was then Serena realized that no one was out. No one had left their homes.  
Only she had been foolish enough to venture out into this cursed day.  
  
She grabbed Luna, "Come on Luna, I NEEEEEED ice cream!"  
  
And they were off and flying again. Heat wafted off the streets making everything  
blurry. Then sun blared down from a cloudless sky. It was high noon. There  
were no shadows.   
  
"No shade, no clouds! WHAT IS THIS!? WAAAAAAAAHHHH--pant pant!"  
  
Serena was ready to drop and simply melt in the street when she spotted the other  
ice cream parlour.  
  
"Hurrrrayyyy!" She exclaimed and pulled Luna along in a run on what Luna reflected, must  
have been her fourth or fifth wind.  
  
They burst into the ice cream parlour and Serena rushed up to the skinny, freckled  
white-capped cashier.  
  
"One chocolate ice cream please!"  
  
He frowned at her, "Uhhh....we only serve vanilla miss--that's why we're called   
'The Vanilla Ice Cream Parlour'."  
  
Once again the wild eyes and strange tick--which was growing ever more pronounced--returned  
as Serena's normally high pitched voice dropped to a deadly level,  
"Do you think, in this heat, I stopped to read the name of your ice cream shoppe?   
Hmmmmm?! And WHAT kind of ice cream place only serves VANILLA?!"  
  
Then she stormed out into the wicked heat again. Nearly out of her mind.  
  
"WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO LUNA?!"  
  
To which Luna replied by leaping out of her arms and running off towards home.  
  
"Traitor." Serena muttered. Then she turned to her left and shrieked. Rubbed her  
eyes. Looked again.  
  
"...........Darien?" She finally asked the tall, sopping figure, still standing in  
the sprinkler where she'd last seen him.  
  
He nodded at her as if there were nothing the matter, "Meatballhead. I would make  
fun of you but.....first of all it's too hot, and second of all, you seem to be   
without meatballs today."  
  
She frowned rather blankly at him a moment, trying to take all that in. Then she   
stared back at him,  
  
"uhhh, you know. Maybe if you'd take off that green jacket you'd be less overheated."  
  
He frowned at her, "I am NOT taking off this jacket!"  
His voice held that same, half-mad quality that her own had back at the ice  
cream palour--and....was that a tick in his left eye?  
  
"Besides," He continued calmly, "I'll be fine as long as I stay in this sprinkler."  
  
Serena shook her head. Who could argue with logic like that?  
  
"But....you can't stay in there all day!"  
  
"Oh really?" He questioned, raising one eyebrow, he looked around the abandoned streets  
for effect, "I don't see anyone around to object--do you?"  
  
She paused, looked around, then, "Good point."  
  
Maybe it was just the effect of this dreadful heat, but Darien was actually starting to  
make sense--and he was standing, fully clothed, in a sprinkler, on someone else's lawn.  
  
Who'd've figured?  
  
Serena looked from the rolling heat, to the sprinkler and back again before doing  
the only thing she could. Throwing down her purse and stepping over the bushes towards  
the sprinkler.  
  
"Make room for me in there!"  
  
"No way, there's ONLY room for ONE in here!"  
  
"I am NOT melting because you are GREEDY Darien Chiba--push over!"  
  
And with that she shoved him out of the sprinkler and stepped into the cold water  
gratefully.  
  
But he quickly butted back in and an all out war began.  
  
SHOVE  
  
"Step aside Meatball brains, *I* was here first!"  
  
SHOVE  
  
"I couldn't care less JERK! *I'm* here now!"  
  
SHOVE  
  
"Mine!"  
  
SHOVE  
  
"Mine!"  
  
Finally they both crammed in, dangerously close, sopping and desperate to stay cool.  
Serena turned so her back could get wet and found herself nose to nose with Darien.  
And oddly, he looked even handsomer sopping wet.....his dark hair curling boyishly over  
his forehead. She had a sudden image of kissing him and her eyes widened in surprise.  
  
She found herself gazing into his impossibly blue eyes for far too long a moment to   
be healthy between enemies.  
  
Maybe Darien was a conceited jerk who enjoyed tormenting her, but he was awfully  
cute.....  
  
Darien watched her face a moment before doing the unthinkable.....leaning down  
and kissing her.....  
  
But what was he to do, trapped this close to the Meatballhead, the girl he loved to  
tease? The girl who looked so cute when she was mad.....but now, pressed up close to  
him and soaking wet.....her looks took on an entirely different quality.....one that  
made it impossible NOT to kiss her.  
  
No matter how insane it was.  
  
He felt her start a bit but then return his kiss....carefully at first....but then with  
full abandon.....must have been the heat. Or the cold water. Or both?  
  
He wrapped his arms around her and kept the kiss going as the sprinkler moved over them,   
back and forth, back and forth.....until.....  
  
SPLAT.   
  
It shut off.  
  
They didn't notice for a moment until a woman's voice cut through the silence,  
"PERVERTS!!!!!"  
  
They both turned startled to see a woman, standing next to her faucet, hands on her hips  
glaring at them.  
  
"GET OFF MY LAWN!!!!"  
  
Serena and Darien turned and fled awkwardly away. After a block or so they stopped, panting  
and miserable.  
  
"What now?!" Serena exclaimed.  
  
Darien didn't answer and he was staring at her oddly.....why?  
  
She looked down and realized. Her tanktop was white....so were her shorts....and they   
were wet.  
  
"AHHHH!" She shrieked, trying to cover herself in vain, "Give me your jacket!"  
  
"What?!"   
  
Her eyes were RED, "GIVE ME YOUR JACKET RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
He obeyed and handed her the heavy, hideous green blazer (an: I spend WAY too much time  
contemplating ways to destroy that thing in my fics......bwahahahahahahaha!)  
  
They walked in silence for a while after that. Serena was dieing slowly in the  
heavy wool blazer.  
  
"Uhhh...you know, maybe if you took that jacket off, you wouldn't be so over heated."  
Darien mocked, throwing her earlier words back at her.  
  
She glared daggers at him, "Shut up JERK! No WAY are you getting to see MY underwear!"  
  
"Too late!" He teased again and dodged her fist.  
  
She sighed, "I'm too hot to even PUNCH you!"  
  
"What we need, is another water source." He observed, scanning the empty city   
streets.  
  
"Wait, wait....." Said Serena slowly, choosing her words carefully, "Isn't there...  
a fountain at the park?"  
  
She finished in a whisper, as though she were saying something sacred.  
  
Darien's eyes widened, "Y-you're right! You're actually right!"  
  
He danced her around in a circle laughing madly, "We aren't going to DIE in this  
HEAT!" He sang.  
  
She laughed and then stopped him, "Stop wasting valuable energy, we still have to get   
to the park!"  
  
They broke off in a run, panting and sweating until they could hear the water up  
ahead.  
  
"I hear it! I hear it!" Darien cried wildly.  
  
"Me too!" Serena cried jubulantly.  
  
They broke into the clearing and saw the crystal blue fountain. It was like an oasis in   
the desert.  
  
Darien splashed in first--after losing his mind completely and throwing off his heavy  
black pants and shirt. He lept knee deep into the water in just his boxers.  
  
Serena might have been startled by this--except she was half-mad from the heat as well.  
So she simply shrugged it off and tossed off his jacket before splashing in herself.  
  
"WATER! Beeeeeeaaaaaauuuuutiful water!" She cried gaily, laying back in it and then   
jumping up again to splash Darien.  
  
In this searing heat, with no one else around, an odd truce had formed.  
  
They chased each other around, splashing and falling over--glad to be alive.  
  
It was several minutes--or was it hours?--before they realized they were standing in  
the public park fountain with their underwear showing, carrying on as though they were  
the best of friends.  
  
They stood close again and with a sudden shiver--if possible--Serena remembered the kiss  
from earlier. The way his lips had felt.....the way his arms felt around her.  
  
Darien took a step closer to her, then swung an arm around her and pulled her to him  
once again, "Must be the heat...." He muttered before pulling her into another kiss.  
  
And then time became meaningless.....everything became meaningless.....and they stood  
kissing in the fountain for a long, long time......  
  
Long enough that the first late afternoon passerbyers went unnoticed by both of them....  
....as did the television crews that began to show up to capture this odd display.....  
...no, it was the police that finally broke the moment, tapping on their shoulders in front  
of the sizable crowd and the glare of the television lights.  
  
"Excuse me, madam, sir....but I'll have to ask you to step out of the fountain."  
  
Serena and Darien dazedly pulled apart and then turned to face the police officer with  
matching wild looks and eye-ticks.  
  
"What?" Serena asked in a deadly tone of voice.  
  
The police officer was caught of guard and took a tentative step back.  
"It's er, illegal to step *into* the fountain m'am--plus, neither of you are  
decently clothed."  
  
A resounding whoop echoed from the crowd.  
  
"I'll have to ask you both to step out of the fountain...."  
  
Darien met his gaze levelly, "No."  
  
Perhaps it was because he was suffering from some sort of heat-madness and   
had not figured out it had finally cooled down. Perhaps it was because stepping  
back into reality meant no more kissing Serena.  
  
Perhaps some combination of the two??  
  
Whatever the case, Darien was suddenly sure that nothing and nobody was removing him from  
the fountain. And Serena rallyed by his side.  
  
They smiled and faced the policeman grinning, "NO!"  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*  
*  
  
  
Ken Tsukino walked into his house exhausted, "I'm home!" He called to his wife.  
  
"Hello honey, you just sit down in the living room and I'll call you when dinner's ready!"  
  
"Thanks sweetheart!" He called back appreciatively.  
  
He threw himself onto the couch and flipped on the evening news.  
  
"And that's all for the national news, but in the local news, a couple had to  
be forcibly removed from the Tokyo park fountain earlier this evening. They were found  
half naked and kissing passionately. Police officials had to wrestle the pair out of the  
water! Apparently, they did NOT want to be disturbed!"  
  
The Reporter chuckled and so did Ken Tsukino--until footage of the couple filled the  
screen.  
  
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" He screamed, "IIIIIIIILLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNEEEE!"  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*  
*  
  
  
"Do you suppose Serena even REMEMBERED we had a scout meeting today?" Rei asked with  
annoyance.  
  
"What do YOU think?" Lita asked, rolling her eyes.  
  
"Thank goodness for your homemade ice cream maker Lita!" Enthused Mina eating  
her TENTH chocolate icecream cone.  
  
"No problem Mina!"  
  
Suddenly Ami's voice cut in from the next room, "GUYS COME QUICK! YOU WON'T BELIEVE THIS!"  
  
They all rushed in to see Ami staring at the TV mezmorized.  
  
"What?" Scoffed Rei until the footage of Serena and Darien making out in the foutain  
flashed on the screen.  
  
"I-I think I need to sit down." Said Lita faintly.  
  
"Me too." Said Rei.  
  
"I don't believe it." Breathed Ami.  
  
"I KNEW IT!" Cheered Mina, taking another bite of her ice cream.  
  
"What?" Gasped Rei, as the other two girls stared at her in shock.  
  
"Oh, those two were DESTINED to be together, trust me, I'm the senshi of love!"  
  
"Serena...." Choked Ami.  
  
".....and DARIEN?" Finished Lita.  
  
THUNK   
THUNK  
THUNK.  
  
Three of the four sailor scouts fainted.  
  
The fourth simply laughed and kept eating her chocolate ice cream.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
tra la la, the end. Another mad little short by nat-chan.  
  
Hope ya liked?  
  
*dodges tomatoes*  
  
Awww, you KNOW you did!  
  
*dodges chairs*  
  
You're just kidding around!  
  
*runs away from rabid dogs released by minna*  
  
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! 


End file.
